This is the Taiwan that I am used to. When I visited here before, it was always during the winter. I remember the first time I visited Taipei, nine years ago, I didn’t even think about the weather and didn’t carry a jacket with me. My friends and I did a day trip up to the mountains and I wore jeans and a top… I was so cold that my lips turned purple! I still remember at the end of the day, the tour guide dropped us off in a shopping district instead of our Airbnb. I went straight into Mango and bought a warm, winter jacket.
This time, I am much more prepared. I can walk around slowly and observe the city in the rain… it doesn’t change the running of things very much, only the atmosphere. The mountains can hardly be seen anymore, completely covered by fog… the sky is an off white. It would be easy to feel cut off from the rest of the world, but yet there continues to be activity on the streets. Perhaps even more so.
The steam emanating from food stalls just seems more inviting, the LED lights lining the shops shine brightly and bring a little cheer to the street. Even despite the lack of sun, the awnings still cast a faint green glow, like the glass of a beer bottle covering each shopfront. Umbrellas of all colours, oversized hooded jackets wrapped around little faces and bright yellow taxis in abundance… there still remains some vibrancy in this rainy weather.
But anyway, the rain means that certain activities are out of the question. No hikes for me today, no walks along the river… it almost feels like a relief sometimes. I like to be active, but I never listen to myself when I need to slow down. The rain almost gives me permission to sit and take a moment to let it all sink in. To reflect, stay indoors and drink or eat something delicious.
This also happens to correspond with my mood… it’s always the same whenever you leave a place. I feel as if I have part of my family here in Taipei. I wonder when I am finally going to get sick of saying goodbye, and just stay in one place.
It’s not only the friends and family who I leave behind physically, but it’s also the version of me who has learned and grown while I’ve been here. It’s as if I have little versions of me spread throughout the world… every person who I have left part of myself with, and every person who has left part of themselves with me.
As if I am constantly saying goodbye to myself, over and over. Who will be the person that I do not say goodbye to?
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