Recently, my days are happily empty. I often sit by the window next to the heater with a drink. Although it is sunny here, the temperature is still a little low. Especially as soon as I get up, I don’t like to talk to anyone or think about anything. I simply want to sip my coffee and look out. I see the sun rising up slowly in the sky, altering the patterns of shadows within the mountains as it moves. The clouds pass slowly over the peaks, casting their own shadows as well. An array of moving shapes, light and dark green, perform a little show for me unknowingly. Doing nothing is one of my favourite things to do.
When I do nothing, I notice the layers of life around me. Like yesterday evening, I found myself with nothing much to do so I sat by the window while my friends prepared for the next day’s lunch. It reminded me of being home. The evening air was getting a little chill, and the light was soft and purple. There were sounds in the kitchen – pots and pans, oil frying spices and herbs which gave off a delicious scent. All this movement happening within the house, which cannot be heard to those doing chores in their own home. I wonder if the birds can hear the noise of cooking through the glass of the windows and the stone of the walls?
When I am still, I can hear the birds calling out all day long. I can see them dipping, rising, aiming for little insects and swopping them back up into their nests. If I relax a little more, I can feel another layer of movement. The trees swaying gently, almost imperceptible to the eye from where I sit. There are also little insects, little creatures crawling around and figuring out what to do with their day before it gets dark. Similar to myself I guess. All these layers of movement within the canvas that my eyes are able to reflect before me, I understand why people say that it’s like a symphony.
And this music can be appreciated no matter where you are. I used to do the same thing when I lived in Shanghai, a maze of concrete buildings and buzz of activity. I’d find a café to sit at and watch the world go by… and there was a lot of “world” that I could watch over there. If we consider that cities have millions of layers of more activity than the countryside, we can understand why visiting a new city can be disorienting at first. But still, it is music and there is a rhythm and melody to it just as interesting as anywhere else. It is just a matter of time before we habituate ourselves to one of any different routines of life we could possibly occupy.
What I can say is that slowing down has done me so much good. It’s helped me to remember that amongst all the things moving and making noise in the world, the one thing I have control over is me. It’s helped me to remember the difference between what I want and what I need, and how the desires of others must first belong to them before I can contribute to anyone’s life in a positive way. The emptiness of my day has helped me see the empty spaces within myself. As such, I have become conscious to not just fill that emptiness with anything I can find. It’s perfect preparation before jumping into a totally different culture, pace and way of life… in which I will be immersed in one week!
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